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There comes a time when gardening in Costa Rica...



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Published on Saturday, November 23, 2024






By Victoria Torley




There comes a time in the life of every gardener when:


Your clothes are too dirty to put directly into the washing machine. There are a couple of choices. You can get into the shower with your clothes on and remove them slowly as the soil goes back to where it should be or you can remove them in the tub (I should be so lucky) fill the tub with water, and stomp them like grapes.


You are so dirty that you have to run the hose over yourself (and your clothes) until your spouse will allow you in the house. Go directly to the bathroom, do not pass “Go,” and do not collect any more dirt.


You realize that your spouse was right when he/she called you in. You ache all over, you need aspirin (maybe codeine would be better), a hot bath, and a massage. Maybe a heating pad would help. Or some ice packs.


You begin to listen to your dog when he whines that something is dangerous. Dogs do have a special way of knowing. Mine barks at me.


You realize you really do have enough flowers (suggested by Metric Man who should know better). Okay, gardeners never believe this, it is usually just a momentary response when your significant other suggests, “Honey, don’t you have enough flowers?” The truth is you never really have enough flowers no matter what your spouse says. There is always room for something new. Really. I have 1,200 orchids so I should know.


Despite all your good intentions, bug spray and sunscreen,  you come home covered with itchy bites and red as a beet. Maybe you should have checked the labels that said, “Renew every 4 hours.”





 



Your neighbor drops in while you are gardening and wrinkles his nose at you from 2 meters away. After all, you have been mixing cow manure with the compost. Maybe he has a point.


Your garden help says he needs help. Things have gotten way too big for just one part-time worker. Maybe just pull some stuff out and plant some trees. Less work that way.


Your spouse wants to go out to dinner but you are way too tired for that. Come to think of it, you haven’t been out to dinner in 8 or 9 months. Hmmm. Where did the time go?


Finally, you consider (however briefly) chucking the whole thing and moving to a condo. Nah, you are way too young for that.






Plant for the week.  This is an unusual one, the night-blooming Hylocereus undatus an amazing cactus that produces the dragon fruit. This cactus is on a tall stump in full sun and seems to love its position. Forget what you have heard about cactus needing a dry climate, this one gets a ton of rain.




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Find more amazing stories about gardening in Costa Rica on 
the AM Costa Rica Garden page. Questions on this article, Ms. Victoria Torley, gardener columnist, can be reached by emailing victoriatorley1@gmail.com

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